Kootu to glory.(probably the worst title for this post)

"The arc of justice bends towards something"-someone

"எப்படி பாடினரோ அடியார் அப்படி பாட நான் ஆசை கொண்டேன் "

I am simply astounded by what has happened to my life in a few split seconds. I am never the person who wants to see the bright side of things. I am quite the contrary. I am glum, and I believe human beings face perennial destruction by mutual greed and hatred and that the society as a collective only strengthens our mutual egos to dominate and outlast the others and that, ok, you get the picture.

And then, the most beautiful thing happened(The worst thing being this grammatically wrong statement beginning with 'and'). I was listening to a lovely raguvamsha sudha on the tape, and chopping vegetables, little realizing that I was on the verge of a cataclysmic change of unheard proportions, one that would change the entire human way of thinking and the blah.

I slowly lifted the lid off the pressure cooker, and poured some ghee onto the kadai, and watched the satin silky goo of moong dal rubbing off on the kadai, reluctant to leave her, lustily clinging onto her, licking her insatiably, wanting to savor every single caress, ok, what are we talking about now?

The mixture simmers to a boil.

My blood rushes to my head, and I hear the sound of my own pulse. My heartbeat, tak, tak, like that villain knocking a maiden's door at 12 in the night to murder her for no reason. I mean, why would someone be stupid enough to live all alone in a house so big and make yourself an easy target for serial killers? Its much easier to just put a bulls' eye on top of the house with a marquee going "I am alone, queer people".

The mixture, yes. The slimy thing, the beautiful slimy thing, the varnished beautiful slimy thing, the still-using-redundant-phrases varnished beautiful slimy thing...

I am in the throes of passion, tempted to taste it. It is hot, very hot. A sachin-tendulkar-straight-drive hot. A vvs laxman-late cut-hot. But let's be honest, dravid's is much better. Then again, chanderpaul has a nice variation on that one. 

I neatly touch the tip of my finger(I could have written fingertip, but no) and taste it.

Michelangelo, completed the sistine chapel and yelled 'I am extremely phenomenal'. Alan turing cracked the enigma and screamed 'Spank me hard'. Ok, maybe something else too.

I had, for a moment, stopped to understand everything and understood everything.

It was a paatum-naane feeling, when he goes 'naan asaindhaal, asaiyum, akilamellame'.

I had created the most divine capsicum poricha kootu. 

I am now burdened with the responsibility of this greatness thrust upon me. Future generations will refer to my work as the work of 'kootar'. I bow my head with all humility at this unprecedented gesture of the gods and goddesses(I didn't know how to type this word, who knew goddess had two d's?) to this simple, humble, naive, moronic, crappy, fumbling, disgusting, irritating, hmm, must stop now.

It is time for us to listen to this:

எத்தனை கோடி இன்பம் வைத்தாய்

எங்கள் இறைவா! இறைவா! இறைவா!

சித்தினை அசித்துடன் இணைத்தாய் - அங்கு
சேரும் ஐம்பூதத்து வியனுலகமைத்தாய்!
அத்தனை உலகமும் வர்ணக் களஞ்சியமாகப்
பல பல நல்லழகுகள் சமைத்தாய்!